the petite pig

what were you thinking putting all that meat in that wok?

so, after receiving over a hundred emails today, here are the answers to some of your most burning questions regarding last night's show:

what did morimoto say to you?:
"i would not serve your food to human beings."  no joke. but believe me, when someone like morimoto talks to you even if it's completely negative, you just smile. he's morimoto after all. what a culinary god. did you see what he did to that cucumber?

what were you thinking putting all that meat in that wok?:
i've definitely been thinking the same thing. believe me, this same question has haunted me for the past four months. i have spent many a sleepless nights going over those five minutes thinking about what i could have done better. for that challenge, each one of us was given a breakdown of our quick-and-easy recipe telling us what we needed to prep for our mise en place, what swapouts needed to be made and what we were to do on camera. in my breakdown, i was told to make a swapout for my tomato sauce but not my ground meat. in my initial read through it, i thought, "this can't be right. that meat is not going to cook in 2-3 minutes to allow me to do everything else." i should have listened to my gut and made that extra swapout for my ground meat rather than follow those directions, which i thought we had to do. still i could have remedied it by just putting just a little bit of meat in that wok. but when that camera turns on, it literally saps 50% of your intelligence. whatever game plan i had in my head would evaporate from my head. i've learned my lesson and what' done is done - no use in dwelling.

can i get the recipe for that asian bolognese?:
why, of course. not only will i put the recipe up later this week but i'll also put a video of me demo-ing the dish again (if i can figure out how). this time i will teach you how to cook meat rather than not cook meat - hopefully, i'll redeem myself somewhat as a cook. stay tuned . . .

also visit the food network site to read the journals we kept during the show. new videos are also up in the video gallery that give a great behind the scenes look.

who will be the next food network star?

who's your pick?

my marathon oscar speech

"the next food network star" series

entry number four: my marathon oscar speech

so, for all those who tuned it tonight, you know that i won’t be the next food network star. i know a lot of you are sad/angry/disgruntled for me, but don’t be, because worse things have happened, and i walk away from this experience with nothing but happiness, inspiration and appreciation. happiness that i got to take a huge risk to pursue something i love and not make a total fool of myself while doing so; inspiration to continue on my culinary journey after meeting seven talented and amazing chefs and personalities; and pure appreciation for having had the opportunity to experience something so unique and different. it was a tough decision to hear, but it was a fair decision. i was the only one who did not finish my dish in that last demo. seriously people, i demoed how to not cook meat for five minutes. i deserved the boot. however, if you still feel cheated, email the food network and let your voice be heard. 

i watched tonight’s 2 hour premiere surrounded by love, a huge smorgasbord of down home southern food and family (or the closest people i have to family out here in the bay area). the evening ended in a lot of satisfied bellies and a lot of hugs – i could not ask for a better way to watch my big tv debut. to me, the funniest thing was how stressed out everyone was during those two hours. if they were stressed out, you could only imagine what it was like going through those challenges . . . it was definitely not a piece of cake and i learned so much about both my strengths and weaknesses during that time.

 

i have faced a good number of challenges in my life, but i don’t think anything has really compared to the challenges i faced in that studio - never had i experienced such nausea for days on end. i did not sleep, could barely eat, had butterflies to the point where i felt like i just wanted to vomit all day long, was just one big sweaty mess- seriously, i would have been the perfect candidate for a “sure” deodorant commercial. everyday, the eight of us went to war together full of camaraderie and support for one another. i can sit here for days on end and try to convey this unique experience in words, but no one can really understand the challenges and stress we went through together but the eight of us. because of that, i will always feel a connection to these seven people that started out as strangers only 4 months ago and are now good friends. i wish all of them only the best. keep on watching because i guarantee you there will be much more great entertainment as well as a great showcase of talent.

lastly, lastly (i know, this is like the oscar speech that wouldn’t end and they've cued the music and i'm still shamelessly exploiting my few minutes of fame. what makes it worse is that i didn’t even win - ha!), i want to thank everyone for their support and vote of confidence over the past few months. in the past two hours, since the show has ended in the east coast, i have been inundated with phone calls, text messages and emails. i cannot explain how amazed i am by the community this little experience of mine has created. i have gotten emails from people i haven’t talked to in years to complete strangers just reaching out – it has been pretty darn cool. most importantly, i am so glad that “the petite pig” was born out of this experience. when i really try to understand what drove me to send in that audition tape – it wasn’t the desire to be on tv, cause believe me, i hated the camera – it was more the desire to share something i love – food – with people. perhaps the tv gig didn’t work out for me, but i hope to continue sharing my recipes, my culinary ruminations and love for food right here, and i hope you continue to visit even if i won’t be the next big tv star chef.

i know a lot of you on the west coast missed the broadcast due to your cable's scheduling. food network will be reairing all episodes. click here for the schedule.

now, some shout outs (this is going to be long, i warn you – i’ve got a lot of wonderful people in my life to thank. and if this has already gotten to “emo” for you, i do not suggest reading on cause it only gets worse.):

my dad, for calling me after the show to tell me how proud he was – regardless.

my mom, for calling me after the show to tell me to not be discouraged and asking, “what were you thinking putting all that meat in the wok?” (she is a very chinese mother)

my little bro, just for being there and always supporting everything his big sis does

tim, for encouraging me to pursue something i love, holding my hand every step of the way, eating my food everyday and telling me how good it is even when i know it sucks

carla, ilana, jill and rachel, for letting me flood your inboxes when this all was unfolding and being so excited for me

the pon, for taking me to a knife skills class as my birthday present (it came in handy until i had to filet that damn fish for morimoto) and one of the best foodie friends i could ask for

brent and jere, for promoting me on their blogs – you guys rock!

joyce, grace and michelle, for being my fellow chinese sisters and inspiring me to hold true to those asian roots in the kitchen

my company, for being so supportive, understanding and flexible with all of this craziness

everyone that worked on the show, for just being such wonderful people to be around

the producers of the show, for pushing me to find myself on camera and for not making me look like a complete fool on the show (thank you!)

andy, beth, carissa, evette, guid, nathan and reggie, for being the only people in the world i could imagine sharing this experience with

em, for making me smile even when i really just wanted to vomit

and to so many wonderful, wonderful friends – thanks for your love and support and undeserved confidence in me.

signing off for now . . . but don't worry, this won't be the last word from this pig. who knows? you just might see the petite pig the book . you just never know where life will take you.

latest press

san jose mercury news: food star search (3/15/06, print edition)

stanford daily: dicing the competition (3/15/06, print edition)

montgomery gazette: wj grad competes for cooking show (3/15/06, print edition)

plus, check out this week's tv guide for a spread on all 8 finalists (week of 3/13) and for all you bay area residents, catch me on live 105 (FM 105.3) this friday morning (3/17). beth raynor and me will be cooking and doing an interview!

the end of the beginning

"the next food network star" series
entry number three: the end of the beginning

i ended entry number two by saying, “the next few weeks following that email were going to be like nothing i had ever experienced.”

and i’d have to say, nothing could have prepared me for what would happen over the weeks that followed that email. it wasn't long before the pressure began as i had to turn around 24 original recipes and answers to a lengthy, lengthy questionnaire about myself and cooking in a very short amount of time. so for four days, i sacrificed my sleep and sanity in order to complete my work while trying to meet this deadline for all my food network materials. i would come home from work with a hodgepodge of ingredients, throw them together and pray they turned into something good. all cooks have original recipes – dishes we can make in our sleep but ask us for recipes, and we can probably offer you only estimates. to come up with real recipes that had exact measurements was a huge challenge. dishes i made on pure intuition suddenly needed to be quantified. was it a quarter cup of red wine versus a half cup? my answer would have to be, “i don’t now – just keep adding more until it tastes good.” however, “salt until it tastes right” or “sugar till it tastes good” were not acceptable forms of measurement by food network standards. between the saturday when i first received that email and the wednesday deadline, i came up with 24 original recipes (2 breakfast; 5 appetizers; 3 drinks; 1 dessert; 4 quick and easy; 4 signature; and 2 date night menus to include appetizers, entrée and dessert) and answered 65 questions about myself and my thoughts on food. even if i wasn’t selected as a finalist, i had a great time just getting to think about food and what it seriously meant to me.

shortly after turning my materials in, i was called by the producer who would be producing my backstory – sort of a “week in the life of jess dang” segment – for the show. it still wasn’t definite if it’d be one of the eight finalists, but they were going to start filming anyway because of their short timeline. so just days after turning in my materials, neil regan a freelance producer came out to film me for two days cooking in my teeny kitchen, working, biking around my neighborhood, volunteering with habitat for humanity, grocery shopping, cookbook perusing in my favorite local bookstore, planning my weekly menu, throwing a small dinner party for friends. we went through hours of interviews related to the answers on my questionnaire. i spent most of the time squirming in front of the camera, a habit i never really grew out of . . . you’ll see when you watch the show.

but even my backstory was filmed, i still did not know for sure if i was going to be on the show. finally, on november 21st just 9 days before filming was to begin, i got the final ok from sue. i was “in” and on my way to new york. work had been closely informed during this whole process and when i received the final ok, they were incredibly supportive in allowing me to take a three week leave of absence. i got calls from food network to arrange my travel to new york and from wardrobe to tell me what i could and could not wear on the show. it was all starting to become real, but i still had no idea what to expect. in the days after neil left and before i had to be in new york for the taping of the show, i tried to prepare myself for something, as i said earlier, that could not really be prepared for. i practiced what it might be like to be a cooking show host by borrowing a video camera from a friend and videotaped myself cooking while trying to entertain. they definitely make it look a lot easier on tv than it actually is in real life. definitely no hand-held cam would compare to what i would soon encounter on my first day of filming and my first challenge on the show.

remember to visit next monday, march 20th for my personal recap of episodes 1 and 2. and of course, tune in on sunday, march 19th at 9:00 pm for the two-hour premiere!

website up!

"the next food network star: season 2" website is up - check it out by clicking on the image below!

pure dumb luck

"the next food network star" series
entry number two: pure dumb luck

(click on "the next food network star" series on the right to read previous entries in this category)

back in october, 2005, the food network conducted a nationwide search for its next big star. 8,000 audition tapes later, they had whittled it down to 8 . . .

guy (better known to us as "guido") fieri
38, restaurant owner from santa rosa; father of two; one of the most inspiring men i've ever had the privilege to come across

nathan lyon
35, a personal chef from los angeles, connoisseur of seasonal, fresh food; a man with an electric smile; graduate of the california school of culinary arts

beth raynor
32, a personal chef from sausalito; independent recruiting consultant; my inspiration that it's possible to juggle both a corporate career and a love for food

evette rodriguez
35, winner of "the next food network star" online contest; mother of four; creator of the ultra-"sofrito" recipe; a woman of great strength, will and energy

andy schumacher
26, founder of his own catering business; father of one; a man with culinary vision far exceeding his age; graduate of the french culinary institute

carissa seward
34, an authentic french gourmand; a graduate of le cordon bleu in paris; a woman of remarkable fortitude and heart when it comes to food and life

reggie southerland
39, a baker from los angeles; creator of the best cookies i've ever tasted; a man that can make you laugh till it hurts

and me . . . a 24 year old consultant who has been cooking for all of four years. i mean seriously, i still start each meal silently praying that i won't burn down my kitchen or burn my meal or burn myself or someone else. how i got into this mix of truly talented people, i have no idea. i'm going to chalk it up to pure dumb luck. so when sue fried the casting director of the show called me in early november, shortly after i sent in my audition tape, i really thought that it was some huge mistake - perhaps they mixed me up with another short asian girl who made wonton noodle soup for her audition tape? i remember sue's first phone call so clearly. she calls me at work and introduces herself. i think, "oh, they must call everyone as a courtesy. this is no big deal." she then proceeds to tell me that they really like my audition tape (and i'm thinking, "my audition tape? but there was nothing special about my audition tape?") and she wants to ask me some more questions about my cooking experience and philosophy. i think, "a chance to talk about food and cooking - sure!" so, we talk for about ten to fifteen minutes and say our goodbyes and i hang up the phone. even after our conversation, i still think that they must be talking to lots of people and don't think too much about it. i do, however, tell my friends tim and ilana, cause hey, it is still exciting. also at this time, i'm still under the impression that there were probably a couple hundred audition tapes submitted. nowhere in my mind did i think this was going to be a big deal or really lead to anything . . . yet.

that was before saturday, saturday the fifth of november, when i wake up to an email from the casting company sitting in my gmail inbox that says, "congratulations! you are one step closer to being selected as a finalist on 'the next food network star' and the possibility of having your own show on the food network. you will be required to be in new york . . ." this is the moment where it kinda hits me that, "hmm . . . this just might be a big deal and just might lead to something," and my reaction to this realization? well, it is to start crying. yes, it is saturday morning and i'm about to go and volunteer with local high school students but i cannot get my butt out of my apartment because i cannot get myself to stop crying. i cry the whole car ride there and finally get myself together in the parking lot before heading into the building.

i have no idea why i had such an emotional reaction to something that i've never really contemplated wanting. i put that audition tape together not on a whim exactly, but without serious consideration as to what it could lead to. after all, when you send those tapes in, you have to consider that hundreds, thousands, in the cases of shows like survivor or real world, i'm sure, tens of thousands of people are sending in tapes, so what are your chances? slim to none. slim, at best. seriously, i thought i was beating the odds when i got into college at one in ten; never in a million years did i think i'd beat the odds of less than one in a thousand and be selected for a reality tv cooking show. so when i dropped that tape off at the post office in october, i wasn't thinking that anything would happen. if anything, it was just a fun project; at most, it was a, "what if?" it didn't even occur to me that i could be selected . . . but hey, like i said before, pure dumb luck worked in my favor, and boy am i grateful because the next few weeks following that email were going to be like nothing i had ever experienced . . . it became something i very much wanted to be a part of, whether i had ever contemplated so or not.

stay tuned for entry number three of "the next food network star" series . . .

the meaning of wontons

"the next food network star" series

entry number one: the meaning of wontons

wontons in chinese actually means to swallow a cloud.  i shared this fact in my audition tape for “the next food network star” in which i try desperately to talk about myself, my philosophy on food and make a bowl of wonton noodle soup in under three minutes. 

so, now is probably a good time to rewind a bit to explain how i, a 24 year old management consultant, came to try out for a reality tv cooking show.  let me begin by introducing myself to those that don’t know me:

my name is jess(ica) dang and like i said before, i am a 24 year old management consultant living in california's idyllic bay area.  i work for a boutique strategy consulting firm in which i conduct all sorts of qualitative and quantitative analyses, play with NPV forecasting models and make pretty power point presentations.  that is my day job.  in the evenings i moonlight as a lover-of-all-things-food.  i read about it; i cook it; i eat it; i dream about it.  the time that people devote to thinking about sex, that’s the time i devote to thinking about food.  to me, they are probably interchangeable, both represent the hedonistic pleasures of life. 

my parents immigrated to this country when i was 20 months old from vietnam, although we are ethnically chinese.  my father worked in the restaurant industry and as a result i grew up in food.  i do not know whether i was a product of my environment or if it was just in my nature to eat but i ate everything - everything from fish eyes to tripe to pate to even swallowing my chewing gum.  by the time i was ten, i had tried cow brain, frog legs (which does surprisingly taste like chicken), snails, abalone, and many, many other edible (and some not so edible) specimens.  i ate enough for someone twice my size and from my love of eating grew my love for cooking.  my freshmen attempts were disasters at best.  at the age of nine, i chose to surprise my mother on mother’s day with a waldorf salad.  for those of you who do not know what a waldorf salad, it involves fruit and mayonnaise.  need i say more?  yeah, i didn't think so.  she took a bite, smiled and politely set it aside.  no, i was not a natural-born-chef despite being a natural-born-eater.  unfortunately, they are not one and the same. 

the turning point in my culinary path occurred the summer after my junior year in college.  i was twenty and made the decision to take a huge loan that i could not afford so that i could study painting and drawing in firenze (florence for all you americans out there), italy.  it was worth every last dollar i shelled out and pound that i gained.  i ate like calories meant nothing – pastas, pizze, two to three new flavors of gelato a day, pastries in between classes, chianti at lunch.  my gastronomical reputation preceded me – people in my program would meet me, and say, “oh, i’ve heard about you - you’re the girl that eats?”  yes, 6 weeks, 11 new pounds later, i was the girl that eats – there was no denying it.  but in between all the long restaurant meals and café visits, i stumbled upon the food markets of firenze too.  i was in love - strolling through the narrow avenues of these markets in a trance, contemplating all the possibilities that existed.  on days where we wouldn’t have organized meals, i’d stop by the market, pick up some cured meats, greens and grains and cook away.  i had no idea what i was doing – i couldn’t read italian so picking up a cookbook wouldn’t help so i was better off improving my dishes.  i came back to the states that summer inspired, inspired to discover, to create, to experiment with all-things-food-related.  and four years later, i’m still doing just that. 

so, now that i have taken you on quite the detour into my life, lets get back to wontons and this  audition tape of mine.  it is a typical weekday in mid-october.  i’ve put in my necessary hours at the day job and rush home so i can start playing in the kitchen.  i get home, put down my bags, turn the tv on to the food network for background noise and start grabbing tonight’s dinner’s ingredients out of the fridge.  i’m chopping an onion when i hear a commercial advertising the return of “the next food network star” for a second season.  audition tapes would be accepted through october 31^st.  i unfortunately did not catch season one, but i think, “how hard could it be to be a cooking show host (apparently, pretty damn hard as i soon would find out)?”  so, i chop my onion, and think, “hey, i can do this.  i can cook and i can be somewhat entertaining when i need to be.  no harm in at least giving it a try, right?”  a couple days later, i’ve borrowed a video camera and a tripod from the library and am set on putting this tape together.  piece of cake, right?  well, about a dozen takes later, i’m thinking, maybe this isn’t going to be as easy as i had originally thought.  i begin to question whether i really want a chance to win my own cooking show all that badly.  time is ticking.  the camera and tripod are due back to the library at 9:00 pm.  the clock on my microwave reads 8:42 pm.  i am down to one last wonton wrapper, and i have no choice but to leave it up to fate.  if this audition tape is meant to be, i have one more chance to make it happen.  taking a deep breath, i start the timer on my microwave one last time.  roll tape . . . 3 short minutes later, i have completed my mission.  i talk about myself, “hi, i’m jess dang and i grew up in the food industry with my dad in the restaurant business . . .”; i talk about my cooking philosophy, “food is not just something that provides sustenance but should be made and received with great gusto and heart . . .”; and demoed how to make my all time favorite comfort food, wonton noodle soup.  hmmm . . . did i remember to mention that wontons means to swallow a cloud in chinese?  i sure hope so. 

stay tuned for entry number two . . .